In another life

Ever wonder what your life would be like in an alternative universe?

From time to time I get a glimpse of mine and that's because another woman with my name is living her life in Los Angeles and, on occasion, I receive her emails.

We have the same first and last names and I would imagine our email addresses are nearly identical.

When I first received the info about "my" new Nissan purchased in LA I freaked out thinking I had been the victim of identity theft. Then I realized that I had received some random emails to "me" that were definitely not to "me" a few months prior and that all these messages were intended for West Coast Jen.

Recently, I started getting more detailed, personal emails for West Coast Jen and I must admit, they're sort of freaking me out but they're also very intriguing.

Based upon the emails I've received this month, I learned West Cost Jen has a child named Emma. Emma is messed up. Big time. She has issues at school. So many issues she has a whole team (Team Emma) lending her emotional and extra academic support at school. Every time I get an Emma email I shudder. Can you imagine me with a kid so messed up she needs a whole team to support her? So sure, I probably would mess up a kid...but I would not handle it well. When would I have time to obsess over the latest J Crew catalog and Kate Spade's summer line?

West Coast Jen also has a baby daddy named Brad who seems like a total prick. Worse than Brad is his (I presume) wife, Leslie. Leslie works at the NBC affiliate in LA. She sent West Coast Jen a nasty email about "Emma's worksheets" to which I finally responded, letting Leslie know she had the wrong Jen. (If you are interested, Emma has these worksheets that she doesn't want to do but they only take ten minutes. Leslie was accusing Jen of not doing them enough with Emma).

Jen also has a friend (personal assistant?) named Stephanie setting up all kinds of crazy appointments for someone named Lucy. I'm thinking Lucy is code for Emma because, why would Jen care? Unless Jen has two effed up kids...because Lucy's appointments are crazy. This week Lucy is going to "Neuro-Fit" and vision therapy. I finally responded to Stephanie to let her know she has the wrong Jen. The thought here was Lucy missing her vision therapy and brain development appointments may spell disaster. Poor Jen is already getting beaten up about Emma's worksheets! What would happen if Lucy was a no show for her appointments?

Last night I got to thinking about West Coast Jen and her messed up child/children, her ex-husband/baby daddy and his bitchy wife/woman and how much I do not envy her. She lives in LA and probably can't even enjoy the great shopping, restaurants and beach time because of all her personal drama. On the other hand, I don't have baby drama and would enjoy close proximity to the Pacific but, let's face it, I'd be even more broke than I am now so I'll just stay put.


I'll stick with my furry children and my single life, thank you very much. 
 
Next time my mind wanders off wondering about the roads not taken, I'll think of West Coast Jen. Getting her emails is sort of like when I'm in New York City and I spy New Yorkers in their apartments and wonder about their lives. 

Wait, it's totally not like that. After all, I would give my right arm to live in a tiny New York apartment to live the broke but fabulous life in New York....but you couldn't pay me enough money to live West Coast Jen's life!