Police Academy (and no, not the movie)

Since I live in a crime infested neighborhood, I have a vested interest in keeping up with the happenings around me. You know, the usual stuff like larceny, robbery, selling crack, etc.

Tonight I attended a neighborhood association meeting about improving the business districts in our corner of the city. I had a blast. We had the opportunity to draw on massive maps of the 'hood and point out the good and, in more cases than not, the not so good. The spot with the most "not good" notations, you ask? The infamous Family Pantry (no surprise there.)!

While there, our community organizer told me about an opportunity she believes to be right up my alley: Citizen Police Academy.

This is a ten week program (talk about hard core) where "citizens" (me!) will learn about topics such as:
-Crime mapping/analysis (you know how I love my daily crime alert emails!)
-Crime scenes / forensics (I can see it now, "CSI Grand Rapids")
-Patrol Operations (I already do Mobile Watch, why not make it more official?)
-Use of Force (I'm envisioning the tazer scene in "The Hangover.")
-Traffic stops (I drive like a bat out of hell through this city - only good can come from this!)

And.....drumroll.....

-Ride-a-long

True! Each participant will be given the opportunity to ride with an officer for one shift (mine better be cute, in his 30s and single).

Now, they don't just let any old schlep off the street do this. You have to, well, not be a criminal (check), must be at least 21 (check plus, plus, plus) and you need to apply and have good references. Both of my community organizers already offered to be my references so I thinking I'm in.

Later this evening, a board member sent me a text telling me I MUST apply so I told her I plan to and she offered to be a reference. She happens to be the manager of a Walgreen's in a most unfortunate location in our 'hood so she has the po po on speed dial and they are tight!

To cap off my night, my favorite gun toting octogenarian Gerri called me. She caught wind that I want to do the academy. She has done it before and wants a refresher (If you ask me think she's trolling for a hot, young cop and is looking to sharpen her shooting skills at the same time). She is thrilled I want to do this so she's "putting in a call" for me tomorrow.

So, yeah, hate to sound cocky but...I've got this. I am so going to be in the next Citizen Academy class. My crime fighting career continues (I know, you too wish you lived in a crime infested neighborhood so you could have such opportunities. Not everyone is as lucky as I am.)!

And, who knows, maybe I'll get to do my ride-a-long with a real life Robert Scorpio!